Oblivimom

I had another blog called oblivimom over on wordpress. I've decide to do an entry for oblivimom because I'm interested to see what responses I get. I think I'll make it a regular feature, maybe once a month...maybe more often. Oblivimom has a way of popping up all over the place. Sometimes she is you, sometimes, she is me. Here are the first entries, the only entries, from my oblivimom blog.

September 3, 2006
Now, I don’t mean to offend or sound critical. You must agree with me that you have either seen, known, or been oblivimom at one time or another. (That is to say, if you are a MOM you have been her!) My personal opinion is that some characteristics of oblivimom can be useful, healthy, humorous, even provide teachable moments. In fact, who wouldn’t want to be oblivimom from time to time?

September 28, 2006 I Was Oblivimom in the Carpool Line Today...
This is my first year of “big kid school”. I am a newbie carpool mom. Just when I thought I had carpool down, I got it good from the school’s traffic lady-cop. You can look at her and tell she lives to blow that whistle. She even does cute little kisses and waves to cars whizzing past her. It’s like getting a sticker or stamp on your hand for doing what your supposed to do in carpool. Did you ever see the Seinfeld episode with the Soup Nazi? If she likes how you move through her line, you get a treat. If you screw up…watch out. Have you ever been so embarrassed that your neck turns red and gets all hot? I had that, and even had blotches on my face too. That’s crazy that she can have that kind of effect on me. I mean, she is probably a real nice lady; but that day, I screwed up her traffic, and she didn’t like it.

Ok, ok, I’ll tell you. I got in the parking lot, made the loop around the playground, my son hops in the car, and we loop back around to the exit. I’m waiting to make a right turn out of the drive way. The radio is off, I’m not on the phone, and I’m paying attention to the traffic. The only sound is my son talking about his day in the back seat. That’s ok, right?

So, traffic on the street is stopped for a red light. The kind souls in the right lane have left an opening for me to cross into the turn lane when the cars ahead begin to move. So, I’m watching, ready to go so I’m not the one holding people up.

WELL, I didn’t know that the traffic lady-cop was wanting me to go on out into the street. Why? Because she was about 25 yards down the street to my left. Apparently she’d been waving me into the turn lane and when I didn’t respond/see her…she comes up to the car and knocks on a window scaring the daylights (and some other things) out of me!

i was so embarrassed

She was telling me to make a wide turn so I could stagger myself into the turn lane. But my car’s butt would have been sticking out in the lane, and the oncoming traffic would have gotten my front end, and my car doesn’t turn that tight…even though she was telling me to go wide…I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t do it I say!

So then, she is waving at me to back up and swing wide. Back up? There’s a Suburban behind me! And a hundred cars behind the Suburban. Back up?!?!

So, I figure its like a referee that makes a bad call and that call costs one team the game. That was the day, that was the call, I lost the carpool game.

September 28, 2006 Is it stealing if you take it back and pay for it?
I was grocery shopping recently with my 20 month old baby boy. He is so precious. I was quickly moving up and down the aisles trying to find what was on my list. That day an extra level of difficulty was added because the store I shop had decided to re-arrange EVERY aisle.

So, I’m paying more attention to what I’m looking for than anything else. I was looking for a raincoat for my 5 year old son. All I could find was ponchos, tightly packed in a bag the size of a Coke can. I was reading the label to see about the size, did it zip, snap…what was this poncho like?

As I read, precious little 20 month old Houdini is out of the stroller. Out of his buckled safety belt that fits snug around his belly when he is sitting. But when Houdini-baby is in his gel state, he can slide right up out of it. Amazing to see, frustrating to deal with every 10 minutes when you are grocery shopping.
So, I strap precious back in and off we go to the next aisle.

I finished my list, checked out, and went to the car. There I unloaded afore mentioned precious 20 month old son, buckled him, stowed the grocery bags, then stowed the stroller and away we go.

Well…about a week later. I get the stroller out of the trunk and out of the compartment that holds miscellaneous Mommy items by the handle spills a kids rain poncho in a bag the size of a can of Coke. I didn’t buy that. gasp! I DIDN’T BUY THAT!

In my haste to secure my precious 20 month old son, I’d stowed the poncho unknowingly in said compartment. doh!

I did, of course, go back to the store and explain that the item did not “get on my ticket” and bought it right then. I opened the poncho at home that evening and put it on my 5 year old…it swallows him like a big blue whale. I couldn’t get it back into the bag the size of a Coke can. So up in the closet it went to wait for a rainy day about 5 years from now.