penny for your thoughts

How can I repay the Lord 

       for all his goodness to me?

I will lift up the cup of salvation 

       and call on the name of the Lord.

I will fulfill my vows to the Lord 

       in the presence of all his people.

Precious in the sight of the Lord 

       is the death of his saints.

O Lord, truly I am your servant; 

       I am your servant, the son of your maidservant; 

       you have freed me from my chains.

I will sacrifice a thank offering to you 

       and call on the name of the Lord.

~

Psalm 116:12-17

Today is a day to remember.

Much could be said and written about tragedy, loss, war, grief, terror...

but

the reality is this:

I AM is on His throne.

He alone is mighty to save.

Faithfully He sustains His children.

In His hands are comfort, healing, and restoration.

His Prince brings perfect peace, beyond our understanding.

When His people humble themselves and pray to Him, turn to Him, acknowledge Him...

He is moved.

He is for us.

Who can be against us.

I am thankful for many things today as I remember September 11, 2001.  I remember in living color watching the events of the day and how they affected me.  I was a new mommy, I will never forget wondering what this would mean to our future.  A baby makes you think like that.

I am thankful for those who fought to protect our country. Two of those men are my brothers.  Both served in Iraq after 9/11.  Both came home safe and sound.  For that I am poured out in thanksgiving.  

I have gotten over the grief of that day.  I no longer feel the same shaken emotion I felt in my core that day.  I have, in a sense, forgotten.  We have all moved forward as a country and aren't daily consumed with the grief and emotion brought on by the attack on our country.  We have all, in ways, forgotten.

Like you forget the pain of heartache, or even child birth...time changes how we feel.

So, it isn't feelings that I ask you to remember.  I ask that you remember the facts of your past...of your present...of your future.

He was. He is. He forever will be...

and 

He, the one true God,

He

      loves

               y o u.

He knows

“He had Abraham take a walk,

Elijah take a nap,

Joshua take a lap,

Adam take the rap.

He gave Moses a 40-year timeout,

He gave David a harp and a dance,

He gave Paul a pen and a scroll.

He wrestled with Jacob,

argued with Job,

whispered to Elijah,

warned Cain,

and comforted Hagar.

He gave Aaron an altar,

Miriam a song,

Gideon a fleece,

Peter a name,

and Elisha a mantle.

Jesus was stern with the young rich ruler,

tender with the woman caught in adultery,

patient with the disciples,

blistering with the scribes,

gentle with the children,

and gracious with the theif on the cross.”

by John Ortberg

The boys have been testing me lately and I hear myself saying out loud, "I just don't know what to do."  It seems as if they have turned away from, forgotten, abandoned all the manners, instruction, and training we have instilled in them their whole short precious lives. I'm finding myself desperate for their attention and obedience.

So, I turn to their Father...their Creator Father...the one who knit them together, dreamed up their personalities, and blessed my life by giving them to me. He is responsible for them, they are His. I'm not shirking my role as mother, nor is Michael as their Daddy...but we know who they belong to and it is on Him I'm leaning...even a little harder these last few days.

Give me your eyes to see them the way You see them. Give me your heart for them. Give me your hands to guide them. Give me your Joy over them. Give me your thoughts about them. Give me your patience with them.

More of you Lord, less of me. Jesus, love my 3 through me.

Train a child in the way he should go and when he is old 

he will not turn from it. 

Proverbs 22:6

Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time 

we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.

Galatians 6:9

What's your verse that carries you through, keeps you focused, or lifts your parent heart?

All Inclusive Kind of Day

Let the record show, today has included the following:

~awakenings
~discoveries
~shedding
~enlightenment
~a rally
~manual labor
~good humor
~injury
~refueling
~dicipline
~discipling
~aha moment
~a good deal
~a "DOH!"

and all before nap time...

Going to Carolina...

not only in my mind...on a real plane~all by myself~how will I survive?~looking forward to the hum of the plane~and even the layover~yes, this is what it has come to.

Top 10 Things I will & won't miss at the same time (yes it is possible):
  
10. (did you drum roll?)  changing diapers!
9.  breaking up/refereeing contests of brotherly "love"
8.  laundry
7.  bodily noises you can only imagine being made by THE most precious boys E V E R
6.  little people crawling into my bed at hours of the morning so early they are unspeakable
5.  little people insisting that the only way they, or I for that matter, will get any sleep is if it happens in my bed
4.  little people
3.  hearing my "name" or variations there of, repeated a multitudinous number of times 
2.  being in my "own" space
1.  being with


I'm taking my pseudo~shuffle loaded with listenings, a book...or 2, and an infinitesimal amount of liquids.

See you soon! Buh-bye! Bye now! Buh-bye!

wonder if they still give peanuts....

8 Reasons Why I Am Not a Successful Blogger

I am a wannabe. I wannabe a writer...among other things.  Today though, I'm lamenting the fact that I am not the writer I wannabe.  So, I've been wasting time in the vast void of cyberspace perusing the internet  looking for resources to inspire, help, and, well magically give me what I want.  

What I found instead was an article called The 8 Habits of Highly Effective Bloggers. 

8 habits. Sooooo, if it takes 40 days to make/break a habit, I'm looking at 320 days to become a better blogger.  *sound of crickets chirping*

Anyway, like I said I found this article and I'm gonna break it down point by point...habit by habit.

1.  Effective bloggers are prolific.  "Great bloggers put serious time into researching, writing, editing,  and planning posts for their blogs."

Ok, see time. I don't even have time to finish this post. Time to go pick up 9.5 from camp.

I may or may not return to finish this, soooo, don't hold your breath.

This is insane!

Ok, its just that this is what's going on in my life, right...so why not put it on my blog! I want to tell everyone I can about how God answered our prayers!  He is our portion, our provider...everything under the heavens and earth is HIS! Look at the way He is providing for my family!

We began praying, in desperation really, that somehow God would make our financial situation work.  We felt like there were areas that we struggled in because of poor judgment in the past and now we are feeling the consequences of that sin.   But you know what...God just didn't come waving a magic wand and make it all go away.  Nope, He has done something way better.

In this season of making-do, God has taken our little and made it much...MUCH more than I ever imagined!  I am smiling because that is just so Him! :)

So for our family of 5 our grocery budget had been close to $200.00 each month.  Sometimes it had to be less, much less.  Also of note, that included food and household items...even makeup and toiletries.  I was a Wal~Mart shopper and would buy generic products to stretch our money only getting name brands on a few things I just had to...and only getting those on sale &/or with a coupon.  I thought I was a couponer, I thought I was doing all I could...I guess I was with the limited knowledge I had.

So, about a year ago, it was getting close to Christmas and a friend gave me a heads up about a great deal on batteries at CVS that gave you a bunch of money back in ECBs (extra-care-bucks).  So I stocked up and got so excited that I finally knew how to catch good deals at CVS.

Oh, little did I know just what the possibilities were!

About that time too, I was googling for something and a site came up...easternshoremoms.com HELLO!  Wow the information she had out there!  But I never really made time to keep up with the deals to be had. I just still didn't get it.

WELL, I'm rolling up the Megillah here and getting to the point....

HERE IT IS:

• You can shop for all that your family needs...and sometimes wants...and get it for pennies on the dollar.
• You can dramatically change the face of your family budget by shopping smarter.
• God is good...all the time...even in my least favorite chore: grocery shopping. HE is providing for our needs and our wants.

You know, it is just like that hill covered with people who wanted to hear Jesus AND be fed.  There were more mouths to feed than food to feed them with.  That may be you, I'm not foolish enough to think that even in my friend circle there are not other Mom's affected by how much groceries cost, and making the decision on a weekly basis of not what to buy...but what they can only buy.  God sees you.  It isn't in His heart for your need to go unmet.

So, they went to Jesus, and they told Him, "We can't feed these people...there's too many and we don't have enough food."  Jesus didn't freak out, send them away, or cancel the meeting.  No, He simply looked at what they had...some pieces of bread and fish enough for  a boy's lunch.  He took it, and thanked God for it and then they started handing it out.

He took the little and made it much...MUCH more than they ever imagined...they even had LEFTOVERS.

I asked Him to help me. He did.  He kept putting in front of me a better way.  He finally got my attention.  I am so glad He tried more than once.

In the last month we have gotten gobs of free cheese, free cereal, free diapers, lightbulbs, and skin care products.  Free candles, cleaners, and toothpaste...and deodorants too.  That is all in addition to the miscellaneous groceries we've bought at savings of 50% on the low end of savings - and 76% is my high at the grocery store.

To God be the glory, this is a GREAT thing He has done!

Some of you reading this may have even been a part of this work He did, so I want to thank you too.  With all my heart I thank you for the part you played in helping me.

With sincere thanks and appreciation to:

our first Crown Financial group~and our second; Joanne for the battery tip that opened my eyes to CVS; to Holly for getting me going with my new coupon file ~ for teaching me how to go through ads ~ and for listening to me rant when I was going crazy 
trying to figure it all out;

to the blog writers who share the treasure that is good information~

easternshoremom, pennysaved-pennyearned,bargainbuggy; 

my family for cheering me on and taking an interest in me; 
to Missy & Hope, and all my friends who listen to me 
telling the whole Megillah and are excited with me 

and are evening sharing this new thing with me.

my cup is full...and so are our cupboards

Had to share this with you...

I can't help myself! I'm so excited I had to show you my Publix purchase from last night!

I spent $34.10 and saved $107!!!!!!

$107!!!!! :0

Money~ Money~Money~MONEY!

I have discovered Publix!  I have also discovered saving money at Publix is...FUN!  This is one of the blogs that is helping me do just that:

www.iheartpublix.com


pssst...let me tell you a secret...she's giving away a $50 Publix card too! Check it out!
psssssst...here's another lil' secret...This month, September 2009, I have saved $143.18 which = 79% of the total of my total at Publix. Sooooo worth the drive!

What're you wearing????

Recently a friend gave me a hug at church and then she said, "Oooo, what're you wearing? You smell good!" {Kelly:)} Those words transformed me from the I-got-ready-for-church-in-such-a-hurry-mother-of-3-boys-who-didn't-get-my-coffee person I was into something divine and princess-y. Perfume and a nice compliment can do that.

I read today an article about this girl's fascination with perfume and it got me thinking...me too!
Perfume is akin to mascara, or lipstick even...if its all you can do-do it!

So, I started reminiscing about the perfumes of my past, reflecting on how much I love the perfumes of my present, and dreaming about the perfumes of my future. Silly? Not in the least. It's like a chronicle of my life, a diary of me becoming me, a novel of a woman in process. Really.

Let's go back, not that far...to sometime in 1980-something....you with me?

Love's Baby Soft, I can smell it now! That precious first perfume was some kinda big deal to me. I think I got it in my Easter basket or Christmas stocking one year. Walking down the hall of my middle school it hung in the air. It was like walking through a pink cloud of wonderfulness. *Note, this was before there ever was a Bath & Body Works to dowse us in Plumeria...that came later, much later.

Fast forward to like 7th grade - or close to it- when geometry was the rule of scent for pre-teens...Liz Claiborne in the triangle bottle. I was sure I was the last girl in the world to finally get some. Then I think my triangle was red, not the yellow seen here. Did that matter? I cannot remember now if it did.I loved my Liz, when I finally got some. It was a must have, you would not have dreamed of wearing anything else but Liz.

Unless...
Oh yes, the wonderful Giorgio!
The only way I got to wear this was to use a friend's or beg the condescending counter girl for sample bottles at Goudchaux's. I cannot even remember how this smelled, so recently I smelled it at a discount store or maybe the flea market...did not like it at all. What on earth was the big deal? Sigh, I survived, difficult as it was, without my own bottle of Giorgio in its delicious yellow and white stripe box which can now be had online for under $20. whatever

What was next...OH! OF COURSE!!!! The grandest of all perfumes, so rich and luxurious, so mature, and mysterious...even its name was alluring....


geesh, sometimes, I think I over did it. I mean when your whole closet smells of Poison because the scent is so heavy in your sweaters, coats, and clothing...it was time to lighten up.

Enter Calvin, and he brought to me Eternity. So thankful for that Calvin! With its light airy scent Eternity reminded me of what the beach should smell like. Eternity was indeed the scent that carried me through the lingering moments of high school and into the Eternity of college. I was soooo mature.


So much changes when a young girl goes off to school. There are so many firsts of being a Freshman. It's so strange how one day you have no clue where you're going then all of a sudden you know your way around...the library and the bookstore.

At some point even The Gap had a scent that had to be had. What was it? Oh, there were several weren't there...with names like "sky" & "grass". Mmhmm, grass. I don't think that was their best seller though. I think I had "Dream" or "Heaven".
Somewhere along the way I liked Lauren and then quickly lost interest. I don't think I even managed to finish the bottle. It just seemed to much for me I suppose. Could be I was beginning to break away from the crowd too, and discover that I had not yet discovered my own unique scent...my signature scent.
Around this time, I think I resorted to the abundantly affordable offerings at Bath & Body Works. Everything from Plumeria to Vanilla. It's All Good!

Now, I know what I like. I like the "good stuff". Chanel. I will never forget my first visit to the Chanel counter. That was the day I came closer to womanhood. Chanel No.5 is a classic, but my Chanel is Chanel Mademoiselle. This is so beautiful, softly sophisticated...grace in a bottle. Everything I want to be when I grow up. This is my diva cologne...granted my version of diva is mild, but hey, we all have diva in us to some degree or another. This is mine. I love it.
Thank you Coco! mwah!

Now, really, is it wrong to have 2 signature scents. Is it betrayal to the one when you wear the other?

Daring as it seems, I also have another scent. Oh my goodness, it is so sweet. Floral yet not too much. It is what a lady, a young lady, should smell like. ;) Or a lady so lady like she can wear this regardless of her age and make the perfume even better for her having worn it.
How I met Stella: I picked up the bottle on display at Ulta as I was heading out with my Mom (we were out shopping on my birthday), I sniffed, sprayed, and fell for it...head over heels fell for this perfume.

I wear this every day! I get compliments on it too. This is what I was wearing the aforementioned Sunday. It will stop people in their tracks and they will ask, "What are you wearing?" You will answer, as I did: Stella, Stella Sheer. Then they will go and buy it, they won't complain about it being hard to find or how much it costs, they will hand over their money and they will buy this perfume. They'll wear it and feel beautiful, tranquil, and ever so lady like. Men will buy it for their wives or the women they want to be their wife. It is indeed dreamy.


Sorry, I had to go all Field of Dreams there didn't I.

I have unfortunately discovered what I cannot wear...and cannot even tolerate being around. These 2 colognes brought on the worst allergic attacks I've ever had. *If these are your signature scents...I'm sorry, I don't not like you, I just abhor your perfume.








These are no-no's.
Just seeing them makes
my nose itch!





Anyway, now I'm wondering....What are you wearing??? You smell wonderful, you must tell me what that scent is you're wearing!

Happy New Year!

Out with the old, in with the new.

Yesterday, everybody smoked his last cigar, took his last drink and swore his last oath. Today, we are a pious and exemplary community. Thirty days from now, we shall have cast our reformation to the winds and gone to cutting our ancient shortcomings considerably shorter than ever. ~Mark Twain

Ring out the old, ring in the new,
Ring, happy bells, across the snow:
The year is going, let him go;
Ring out the false, ring in the true.
~Alfred, Lord Tennyson, 1850

But can one still make resolutions when one is over forty? I live according to twenty-year-old habits. ~Andre Gide

New Year's Day:
Now is the accepted time
to make your regular
annual good resolutions.
Next week you can begin
paving hell with them as usual.
~Mark Twain

It wouldn't be New Year's if I didn't have regrets. ~William Thomas

May all your troubles last as long as your New Year's resolutions. ~Joey Adams

He who breaks a resolution is a weakling;
He who makes one is a fool.
~F.M. Knowles

The object of a New Year is not that we should have a new year. It is that we should have a new soul and a new nose; new feet, a new backbone, new ears, and new eyes. Unless a particular man made New Year resolutions, he would make no resolutions. Unless a man starts afresh about things, he will certainly do nothing effective. ~G.K. Chesterton

New Year's is a harmless annual institution,
of no particular use to anybody
save as a scapegoat for promiscuous drunks,
and friendly calls and humbug resolutions. ~Mark Twain

A new oath holds pretty well; but... when it is become old, and frayed out, and damaged by a dozen annual retryings of its remains, it ceases to be serviceable; any little strain will snap it. ~Mark Twain, speech in New York City, 31 March 1885

We meet today
To thank Thee for the era done,
And Thee for the opening one.
~John Greenleaf Whittier

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

17Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come! 2 Corinthians 5:17

Isaiah 43:19

19 See, I am doing a new thing!
Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?
I am making a way in the desert
and streams in the wasteland.

One Nation Under God.

The day after a loss is always a weird kind of day isn't it? Whether its your favorite college team, your kids little league team, or even in politics. It is difficult to lose. When it seems that everything is on the line and you're sure your candidate is the right man or woman for the job and they lose, the loss is hard to take.

So what now? What next? Where do we go from here?

What Now?
I believe that the now of our country is more important than yesterday. Now we have the benefit of having been taught the lessons of history. Now we have a living document that is the foundation of our country written and secured by men who gave their lives to breathe life into it. Now we are a country united in our freedom and determined to protect and preserve our liberty. Now, we are a country whose president elect is a man, born to parents of different races. The yesterday of our country would never have dreamed it to be possible. I wonder if our founding fathers could have imagined where the documents they constructed would carry us and how far reaching their ideals would be. That is something to be proud of. We live in a country where all men and women are free. We are free to run for office, free to vote for candidates of any background, and we are still free when the votes are counted.

Ideologically, spiritually, and politically I disagree with the man our country has elected. Instead of resigning myself to "just pray" I will participate in the process. Now more than ever, I will keep up with what is going on in our government at each level. Now more than ever I will help guard my Constitutional rights by making sure that my voice is heard when elected officials seek to steal them away. Now more than ever, I need to know what my rights are. Now more than ever, I need to pray for my government leaders, support them when they are on the right track, and be heard by them when I believe they are not. Now more than ever, I will pray that God will raise up a new crop of leaders whose hearts He holds and whose steps He orders.

What Next?
Well, the laundry, the kids, then dinner, church...life. Live! Live free! Freedom in Christ first, free as a U.S. Citizen...I am free. You see, life goes on...even after Presidential elections. You have your work, your family, your friends...you have a wonderful life to live. So live it! As if each day were our last, let's live. Has it occurred to you that people across our world would love to be where we are today? Maybe its time to make some new resolutions, maybe its time to re-read 40 Days of Purpose, maybe its time for you and I to do what we haven't already done.

Its time to make a difference; for Christ, for your family, for your country. Have you told your kids the story of our country? Or are you leaving that up to their school? Have you told them about people in your family who have fought for our country? Have you given them a personal sense of pride in being an American? Do they know what it means to you, their Mommy or Daddy, to be an American? So, maybe we should tell them. By the way, have they heard you tell them about Jesus? How important He is to you? Have they heard you say to them all the ways He changed your life? They need to hear that. Tell them today. Season your conversations with it. Let them pray with you about important stuff--like our country, so that when God answers, they will know firsthand that God is alive and He hears our prayers.

Where Do We Go From Here?
The answer to that is yet to be determined. It is up to us isn't it. We've been so blessed, so much has been given to us; our responsibility to our country is great. We have accomplished greatness and we have fallen greatly. I believe our history as a nation is still being written. Will we turn away from sin? Will we renounce abortion? Will we restore the holy institution of marriage to its rightful place? Will we turn away from all that is perverting our minds and hearts? What will you do? Who will you help out so that our government doesn't have to? Will the church be the church? Will we go to our neighbors, the homeless, the widows, the children, the poor, the sick and disabled? What will the church do? What we are capable of is unimaginable! Will we humble ourselves and pray? Will we seek God while He is still found? Will we cry out to God with praise and thankfulness? Will we see Him heal our land?

I believe that since we have so great a cloud of witnesses who have gone before us we must run this race with endurance to the end. Our founding fathers have urged us on by their works and lives; encouraging us by their example: Press on! Carry the torch handed to you by those who have gone ahead! I believe they were men inspired by God who led by His Spirit were able to construct written documents that would govern a great people for many generations. I believe that they knew the success of this country would depend upon the willingness of its people to be united under one God, the One True God.

I believe that where go from here is back to where we began as a country, back to being One Nation Under God.

1 Chronicles 29:11-12

11 Yours, O LORD, is the greatness,
The power and the glory,
The victory and the majesty;
For all that is in heaven and in earth is Yours;
Yours is the kingdom, O LORD,
And You are exalted as head over all.

12 Both riches and honor come from You,
And You reign over all.
In Your hand is power and might;
In Your hand it is to make great
And to give strength to all.

Stargazing

Every once in a while a wonderful opportunity lands in my lap...such as finding a $100 bill in the quad rumpled up on the ground at LSU...then finding a guy selling two tickets for face value, $50, each...and enjoying the LSU vs. MSU game on the house with a good friend.

As wonderful as that was (thank you Jesus!), tonight was even better.

I had the chance to take Jack stargazing. I know it may sound dorky to some of you. It was apparently just that to the dozens of cheezy teenagers wandering aimlessly around out there tonight making stupid cracks revealing more than they probably wanted to about their character and IQ as they collected the little cards for "extra credit". Allow me to illustrate my observations. One comment I overheard was a perfect example of why I am not impressed with our public school system or the quality of those "yewts" in said system...teenage girl to astronomer with telescope: "So which Jupiter is this?" exactly


Anyway, Jupiter was in plain telescopic view showing off four of its moons. Beautiful. Stunning. Dazzling.

Also visible tonight was a star cluster, I didn't get the name, but it was brilliantly stunning. I told a friend earlier this evening that it looked like a "sneeze of stars". I'd like to rephrase that...it looked like someone had a handful of diamonds all shapes and sizes and even diamond dust and just casually dusted one corner the black sky with them...like how Mamaw dusted her counter with flour before she rolled out a dough. Amazing.

We also saw what I think was called a star eclipse. The professor manning that telescope described it to Jack this way, "This is like the double sunset Luke Skywalker saw on Tatouine." Jack replied, "Oh yeah! It is!" I'm thinking, "Ok, whatever...glad you got that."

Neptune showed up too.

Then the clouds rolled in and we rolled out.

What a wonderful evening. I think people have over used the word "awesome" to the point that it has lost its weight in conversation. Everything is not "awesome", however, what we saw tonight was indeed Awesome. The icing on the cake was watching my Jack peek into each eyepiece excited about what he would see, then hearing him describe in his own words his glimpse of the heavens. At one of the first telescopes we stopped at I leaned over his shoulder and softly spoke in Jack's ears these words, "Jack, the same God who made Jupiter and its moons made you." "I know Mom," he said. The astronomer manning the telescope said, "That's right, He sure did."

Awesome.

I feel like I had a visit with God Himself tonight. Like he called me over and said, "Hey, you wanna see something neat?" Yeah, whatcha got? As He reached in His pocket and pulled out just a few of His treasures to show me in the palm of His hand, my breath leaves me for a heartbeat. Those are beautiful! "I got a lot more too. I'll show them to you up close one day." Sounds great, I can't wait!

This was so much more than just showing up for "extra credit". Had those kids actually peeked into the eyepiece and glimpsed God's wonderful creation, would they have realized what they were seeing? Maybe, maybe not. I did. My seven and a half year old son did too. I hope it stays with him, even when he is a teenager. I hope he never forgets how wonderfully he was created by The Creator...the same God that put the stars in place.

"He determines the number of the stars and calls them each by name. Great is our Lord and mighty in power; his understanding has no limit." Psalm 147:4-5

"When I consider your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars,
which you have set in place, what is man that you are mindful of him, the son of man that you care for him?" Psalm 8:3-4

We Remember

I suppose 9/11/01 is the marker for my generation like JFK's death was for others. I remember where I was that morning...like it was yesterday.

Earlier that year, in January, I'd given birth to our first baby. A precious baby boy we named, "Jack". On the morning of September 11, 2001 Jack was not quite 9 months old but we'd settled in to a nice and cozy routine. He was a wonderful sleeper and would wake between 7 & 8 in the morning, play, eat his breakfast, play, then go back for a nap. So, we were in the kitchen-family room having a good morning together and I decided to turn the tv on to catch the morning news on FOX.

Within the hour, I was sitting in the chair watching a news alert for breaking news. FOX cut over to the NY camera man and announcer who were on the roof showing live video of what was at the time thought to be a terrible accident, when a jet crashed into one of the World Trade Center towers. I remember hearing the announcer talk about how much air traffic there is in NYC and that by all accounts this may be a singular accident. I only heard one brief mention of terrorism and a caution that we shouldn't jump to that conclusion.

I was awestruck by the footage I watched while playing with Jack. Moments later, from the roof of FOX's building in NYC as the reporter was speaking, behind his head, live, another jet roared towards the second tower. Then we knew. No doubts remained. We'd all just witnessed an act of war.

Terror ran through me.

That was the mission they had wasn't it.

I scooped Jack up in my arms and grabbed the phone. I called my husband, father, and mother one after the other to tell them what I'd seen. I'm not sure they believed me...at first.

Then a heartbeat later, like lightening running through me, I thought about my brothers. Both had very recently joined the military. One became an Airman, the younger became a Marine. Both were actively serving at the time of 9/11. Of the two, my brother in the USAF was then serving in Wyoming. I forget his exact title now, but he was responsible for the regular maintenance of nuclear war heads. He was on a base that seemed to be, in my mind, a prime target of another attack.

All I could think about at that moment was, "What would this open attack on our country mean for my brothers?"

I remember feeling helpless and vulnerable for a while as I continued to watch the footage on FOX. I watched in awe as pictures of peopling running in confusion came across the screen. Then as the towers crumbled and the wave of grey smoke and dust flooded the streets drowning everything in its path. Fear gave way to anger as I realized that others would so boldly attack us using innocent people as a weapon against other innocent people. I was shocked that something so common to our daily lives as a commercial jet, would be turned against us as a weapon. To the families who suffered such loss in NY that day, losing loved ones and friends...we remember you today.

The unbelievably unreal became real for us all that day. In a moment we were forever changed as a country.

My generation would see war, again.

But this time, the attack came through the front door.

Since that day, many of us have seen our friends and family members forsake their life for ours and go over seas to fight against enemies who would attack us again given the opportunity. These men and women in service to our country have seen opposition as well as support. My hope is that the support far outweighed the opposition. For their sacrifice of time, and for some the sacrifice of living, we remember and say thank you.
For fighting abroad so that we would be protected at home, we say thank you. We remember.

I remember how it felt when the news came of our Marine's first deployment to Iraq. I remember how we prayed and hoped he would accomplish his mission and return to his precious wife and daughter safe and unharmed. I remember the stress and strain it caused his family. I remember how it felt to hear his voice from overseas or get an email from him. I remember how it felt watching the news seeing video of Marines doing the same job my brother would be doing, and knowing he was in harms way. I remember being so proud of him. I remember seeing the concern on my Mom & Dad's countenances. I remember what it felt like to know many people were praying for him by name. I remember how it felt when our Marine came home.

I remember how it felt when news came of our Marine's second deployment....and third.

I remember how I felt when he would call, write, email...and came home, safely each time.

I remember hearing news of our Airman's deployment to Iraq. I remember my heart breaking for his precious family-his wife and two small sons. I remember watching wife's countenance change as she struggled to find her way without my brother there for almost a full year. I remember how it felt to hear my nephews say, "My Daddy is helping fight the bad guys." I remember the long paper chain that represented the number of days their Daddy would be gone...and watching it slowly get smaller as they'd take off a link each day. I remember how proud we were of him. I remember what it felt like to know many people were praying for him by name. I remember how we longed to have him return safe and unharmed. I remember the excitement that would spread through the family when news from my brother came. I remember what it felt like knowing he was in the air, coming home safe and sound.

I remember the images of those wounded heroes coming home for treatment and recovery. I remember hearing news of people who had to grieve the loss of their Soldiers, Airmen, Sailors, & Marines. How those fallen heroes came home to be buried. We remember you.

Today, September 11, 2008 enough time has passed that it might be easy to slip into complacency and be so comfortable that we forget. We cannot afford to forget. The cost was too high. The war was too hard fought...and won. We must not forget.

God, the one true God, please continue to bless America. Please continue to cover her, protect her, and preserve her. Remember us Lord. We remember all that You have done for us.

Green Frogs & "Blue" Mommy

Here it is...the calm after the storm. Yep, still have a pulse...I know because its pounding in my head. I love my blog, its like my longtime friends who live far away or my nearby friends who are unusually busy...my blog is always here and we just pickup where we left off. So here goes, pull up a chair fix yourself a cuppa coffee or tea and let me bend your ear.

Okay, so if you haven't heard by now...we are home schooling. This is pretty high on the list of things I never thought I'd do. It is up there with sky-diving, or say...swimming with Nile crocodiles. You know the saying "money talks"? Well our money said, "You're tripping!" when we were trying to find a way to re-enroll in the private Christian school our oldest son has gone to since Kindergarten. No super-spiritual calling to home school, just plain can't afford private and don't want to trust the public school system with my children for 8 hours of his day for the better part of his life.

I was a little late getting my act together too, not because of procrastination. We moved this Summer and behind that came planning for school including finding a church school covering and deciding on textbooks. So as it ended up, we had our first field trip before our first official day of school!

Off we went to the Exploreum...me, Jack(7), Andrew(3), & Will(1)...for an IMAX film about the Amazon and "Beyond Green" the frog exhibit. Turns out, both topics were appropriate as my children behaved much like the Amazon Jungle natives throughout the museum and exhibits. They were way ahead of me, hopping around from one thing to the next not giving themselves time to actually see or do anything that we PAID good money to do! When I did catch the precious little hoppers, I explained to them that they do not live in the jungle and I'd appreciate it if they could remember that the next time I dare to venture out in public with them again...all at the same time.

About the same time as our field trip, we had an incident at home. I'm enlisting the help of chore charts, very simple ones, to help my children keep up with their responsibilities each day. It is not working. I'm gonna give it time, I think its just still new to them, so we'll see. ANYWAY...first on the list is what I call their "morning routine". So I sent them off after breakfast one morning to get on with their "morning routines" (dress, make beds, tidy up room, brush teeth & hair). So, I have the baby and 7 & 3 are in the bathroom to brush their teeth...when I hear this noise. Can't even describe it now...kind of like a crack-clang-bang with a holla at the end. Not a good sound.

It'd been a rough morning for me, I looked like one of those Wal-Mart baby mamas (sorry for the stereotype-but you know what I mean). With baby on my hip and a crazed look on my face I went down the hall to see what made "the sound". (I'd also like to say here I had not had my time with Jesus or coffee at this point.) I looked in the bathroom, saw 7 & 3 with their jaws hanging open and the fear of God Almighty on their countenances. Just beyond them was the wall...missing two chunks of sheet rock where a towel bar used to hang. My mouth opened and what came out was, "Damn it!" (I know, I know, it was terrible!) Then the excuses and explanations started flying..."HE MADE ME DO IT!" "I'M SORRY MAMA!" "NO! HEEEE MADE MEEEE DO IT!" "WE WERE JUST WORKING OUT!" what?!?!?!?!?! Working out? Yeah, they decided to do chin ups on the towel bar. It didn't hold.

So later that afternoon, after confession, we're doing color pages of realistic toads and frogs like they'd seen at the Exploreum. We were talking about the exhibit and filling out our field trip worksheet for Science actually enjoying our first home school activity at home. So Andrew colors this frog then comes to me and asks, "Mom, can you write his name on my paper for me?" So, I'm excited he's interested and said enthusiastically, "Of course! What's his name?" Andrew then says, "Damn." (choke) "I'm sorry, did you say Tim?" He replies, "Noooo Mom, daaammmnnn." My reply, "Well that's not a frog's name...that's what the beavers build, you know like in Narnia! How 'bout Tim? hmm? Tim the Frog." He agreed.

Tim the damn frog hath taught me a lesson! Lord, my life is the taming of the shrew isn't it? I know he sent my children to bless me, even though they stress me, they are a mirror that reflects what is really down in me. I need Jesus! Always will.

Fast-forward....





Baby Will has turned 1! It was a nice quiet celebration with blue cupcakes and a special birthday hat! The Sesame Street Birthday Band made their regular appearance along with the birthday banner. Silly little things like those really mean a lot to the older boys; 7 & 3 love to hold on to those traditions and were excited to see them out on Will's behalf. We must have sung "Happy Birthday" a thousand times. Fun times and a wonderful memory for us all.

We survived Gustav with only power blinks and steady light rain. The kiddos had cabin fever and liked to drove us bananas, so we started school on Labor Day. How's it going? Well, today it took Jack (7) 2 hours and change to do his Grammar copy work which was to copy the poem "The Goops" by Gelett Burgess. It is 8 short lines. That's all.

This may be my undoing. I almost fell out right here, on the floor. Never mind that I have fever accompanied by a sinus infection with yucky stuff in my head and throat...I almost came undone. I think the fever saved me though...I just didn't have the strength to come unglued. Good for Jack, good for me I guess. I could be confessing much worse tonight otherwise.

So, tomorrow's another day. We've said our prayers talked about what we'll do better and now we trust God...who I know has enjoyed a good laugh or two on us lately.